For this to work, you will need practiced awareness skills. Don’t have an awareness building habit? No problem, check out previous posts for inspiration and ideas on how to get started.
To reveal your mindset on a particular topic, it helps to disentangle three layers of mindset: feelings, thoughts and accumulated experience/beliefs. I’ll go through these layers in detail, but first I challenge you to start small. Noticing your mindset takes practice. In my view, the best way to start is by noticing the things in your daily life that bother you. Maybe it’s your Monday morning meeting, or your neighbor’s voice, or the sound of your doorbell. No matter how big or small, just notice when you are bothered.
For those things that bother you, use your awareness to notice what is going on in your body and how you feel. Is your chest tightening, or your mind racing, or your fist clenching? Whatever it is, don’t try to push it away or rationalize, but instead notice it and try to locate it within the body as accurately as possible.
Now listen to your internal dialogue. What is the voice in your head saying? What is it upset or bothered about really? Try to just notice these thoughts without getting wrapped up in them. Really listen, without responding or justifying. (This is easier said then done. In case you get carried away in a thought, don’t worry. Once you’ve noticed this, simply return to listening to your inner voice). Listen until your inner voice has nothing more to say.
Notice (or reflect on) how you reacted to the thing that bothered you. Was it in proportion to the thing bothering you or was it over-the-top? Is this a regular reaction or something out of the ordinary? Consider whether your reaction really makes sense from an objective point of view. Now consider what experiences you have had in the past they may come into play. Maybe your neighbor with the annoying voice actually reminds you of your previous boss who fired you years ago. Maybe the last 6 Monday meetings were unproductive, and now you expect more of the same. Finally, think about what you think is true in this situation (your beliefs). These beliefs may be newly formed, or very ingrained, but simply make a mental list.
Reflect on your mindset, starting from the “accumulated experience/beliefs” to the “thoughts” and finally the “feelings” layer. What do you notice about your “default” reaction? Is it how you would choose to act if you were in full control? How does it support or undermine what you want? If your mindset holds you back, now you have identified exactly how, and looking into the layers you can examine why, and make changes to evolve.
Now you have the method to reveal your mindset in any part of your life. Try it out, play around with it, and see what you learn. You might just be amazed.
